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The separation game: Divorce law

01 October 2006

All couples embarking on a committed relationship are hopeful of a long and happy life together. Sadly however, not all relationships will last a lifetime. According to statistics just published for 2005*, the divorce rate in England and Wales has fallen by 8%. Good news, but it still means that over 140,000 couples decided to split up permanently and of course that doesn't include cohabiting couples or those ending Civil Partnerships.

The decision to take steps towards separation is always difficult. There may be many emotions to deal with: anger, sadness, disappointment, bewilderment … especially if it's not your decision to end the relationship.

Family and friends are likely to rally around you but you do need to take professional advice. In this first in a series of articles, Sue Andrews, head of the Family Law practice at B P Collins, explains what you should expect from your solicitor.

The first thing to say is that you're doing the right thing … getting initial advice is important, whether the break-up is sudden or has been on the cards for some time, whether acrimonious or mutually agreed and whether or not your preferred outcome is reconciliation. A good family lawyer will be able to empathise with your situation and give you confidence.

Be aware though that you will need other support mechanisms around you - friends, family, perhaps your GP or even a counsellor - because your lawyer is there to give you measured, balanced and fair advice … and that won't always be what you want to hear.

The initial consultation will be primarily an informal, fact-finding exercise but, even so, you may wish to come with a friend or relative. Your lawyer will need to get an idea of your financial and family situation as well as the circumstances of the break-up. You should expect your lawyer to be a good listener but you should also be given advice about any immediate financial concerns, an idea of process, timescale and cost, clarity in respect of your rights, expectations and options and, above all, reassurance, especially if your partner is making things difficult.

* Office for National Statistics